First of all, I admire you for being able to write a piece about yourself (if it is indeed about you). I'm usually too nervous to do that. I think you have some great ideas in this piece. For example, your last six lines are amazing. I'm interested in the image of scorched feet. How did they become scorched? Or is scorched a symbol for something else entirely? You have a lot of room to play with this image, and I would go for it. One piece of advice that I would give is not to try to be so formal. "In order to classify oneself" and "...But, who are they/ to tell me who they are/ unless they have experienced/ a discovery of some type" are a little vague and awkwardly removed from the rest of the piece. Overall, though, good work. I enjoyed reading it.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment